Q&complAints #423 : Pyroerection

If you had to do one trick at a kids’ party, which would you perform?

Post your answer in the LEAVE A COMMENT section below. I’m not the boss of you, though. Don’t write anything for all I care! But come on, think of the children.
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. . .here are my thoughts.

If you had to do one trick at a kids’ party, which would you perform?

I used to love having my back scratched when I was a kid.  Grandma C and my mother were the best!  Recently my wife gently stroked my back for just a few seconds while saying goodnight to me before retiring to bed.  The soft, slow, ticklish caress caused the hairs on my arm to stand on end.  I took the opportunity to introduced her to a new word: pyroerection.  Don’t bother looking it up; it’s not a real word.  The term I was searching for was piloerection.  What a difference a couple letters can make.  I attempted to describe the reflexive response of the sympathetic nervous system to contract the tiny muscles at the base of hair follicles.  Instead, I implanted in her mind’s eye some conflation of flamethrower and phallus.  Of course, I highly doubt the French could have been any more terrified had the deathly fire raging toward them in the First World War emanated from a nude German soldier’s erection.  Thankfully, parents never invite me to their childrens’ parties.  To make sure this trend continues, I vow to perfect my German accent. 


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