Q&complAints #368: Olympic Gold

If every activity was an Olympic sport, in what event would you win the gold?

Post your answer in the LEAVE A COMMENT section below. I’m not the boss of you, though. Don’t write anything for all I care! But I’m sure whatever you write will be pure gold.
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. . .here are my thoughts.

If every activity was an Olympic sport, in what event would you win the gold?

We’ve all done something despicable to win a competition.  Took a peek at your kid’s Go Fish hand while they went to the fridge to get you another beer.  Used a chess engine to finally win a correspondence game against your grandfather.  Cut off your left leg to make weight before your championship wrestling match.  Maybe you’d contemplate those first two, but you’d rather keep both your legs!  Imagine this, though.  You practice and train for years and years, decades even, but never quite reach the elite echelon of your sport.  Your Olympic dreams always just a heartbeat away.  Has anyone in this situation ever purposely given themselves a disability to qualify for the Paralympics Games?  They research the minimum handicap necessary to compete for a gold medal in the sport they love—a shot otherwise not realizable.  The real question is probably not if it’s been done, but what athlete’s gone to the furthest extreme.  Are these athletes dirty, rotten cheaters?  Or are they opportunistic, do-whatever-it-takes, outside-the-box go-getters?  I didn’t have to cheat to win my third consecutive Olympic gold in Pessimism Toward Humanity.  


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