URxProbablyRxight
Meds & Counsel without Patience for Patients
Ever heard of Dick’s Last Resort? Never been to the restaurant myself, but I love the concept. It’s like the court jester in medieval times being able to tell the King the harsh truth since everything he said was in—you guessed it—jest. Why has no pharmacy taken up this business practice? If patients expect harsh but fair truth from the pharmacy team, they’ll accept it readily.
Welcome to URxProbablyRxight. The pharmacy of the future where we provide “Meds & Counsel without Patience for Patients.”
Vaccine Hesitancy
[Rph]: “Alright, so we’re getting your first dose of the Moderna COVID vaccine today?”
[Patient]: “Yeah, my work is requiring I get it. Technically they’re highly suggesting we all get it, but you know what that means.”
[Rph]: “I noticed you’re using the singular it. You’re aware it’s a 2-dose series, right?”
[Pt]: “Unfortunately, yeah.”
[Rph]: “You don’t seem too enthusiastic. What questions or concerns might you have that I might be able to ease your mind about?”
[Pt]: “I just don’t know how it’ll affect me in the future.”
[Rph]: “Most people, with the first dose, just have some arm pain for a few days. It’s after the 2nd dose that—”
[Pt]: “No, yeah, I know all that. I mean how will it affect me in the long-term—like a year from now?”
[Rph]: “I can’t exactly speak to that. Obviously, long-term studies haven’t been done yet.”
[Pt]: “And you’re comfortable giving it without knowing how it’ll affect people?”
[Rph]: “I am, yes.”
[Pt]: “Did you get it?”
[Rph]: “Of course! Both doses, yes.”
[Pt]: “I just hope my future children don’t have autism or some other—”
[Rph]: “No vaccines have ever caused autism! That lie started with a frivolous report that was later redacted. By then it was too late—nobody pays attention to tiny type on page 100, they just remember the headline from months earlier.”
[Pt]: “No, I’m pretty sure it’s true.”
[Rph]: “It’s not! And if you’re worried about your future children, I hope you realize you won’t be able to have any if you die of COVID because you weren’t vaccinated.”
[Pt]: “Whatever. Let’s just get this over with so I can get the hell outta here.”
[Rph]: “Very well. Just a reminder, we recommend hanging around for at least 15 minutes after the vaccination.”
[Pt]: “I’ll be fine.”
[Rph]: . . .
“I am sure you will be fine but you have to stay so we can be assured you do not have a reaction to the shot. If you choose to leave we are not responsible for any immediate issues. Please sign this release form. (After you give him the shot) Don’t be worried about any future kids. With your attitude I made sure there was a sperm sterilizer in your shot. Don’t want to bring any more idiots into the world who care only about themselves.”
You’re hired!